Joseph went to his parent's house in Austin, MN (hometown of SPAM) and I went to mine in Chaska, MN (hometown of Gedney Pickles). I fluttered about the whole week making decisions on jewelry, hairstyles, color of toenails, and flowers. My mother and I spent hours zooming around the Cities looking for those perfect accents. The original plan was to get flowers at the local farmer's markets, but all they had left were crusty daisies and carnations (it is to the flower family what the catfish is to the fish family). Yuck! So, we proceeded to buy out all the Gerbera daisies we could find in the local nurseries. The plan was to decorate our cakes with these.
The rehearsal went wonderfully. We had a healthy helping of food and wine.
Joseph spent that night with his parent's in their hotel in Chanhassen while I slept at my parent's house. The next morning, mother rushed off to the ceremony and reception site to decorate (as we could not do this previous because it is a public park and there are other weddings there). This place was booked up a year in advance! Hence, the friday wedding. We proceeded to get our hair and makeup done in the kitchen of our house.
Mother scurried about at the site like a busy bee at work. We are so grateful for her and all her hard work. How do you repay her back for all that? The question crosses my mind almost daily. I guess that is what parents are for. And hopefully I will be able to provide that for our children (whenever they choose to arrive). Anyways....tangents abound......
Hair, makeup, the stink of nail polish. Kelly, Laura, and I broke out the bag of nail polish. I found colors in there that I have not seen since 7th grade. Let me tell you! I found Pumpkin Orange, Sally Hansen glow in the dark, BLACK!, Prince Purple, and so many shades of glitter I cannot count. Lord have mercy! It was quite enjoyable to go back to the old school polish. As we toss out the old shades, dried out and coagulated, we symbolically clean out our unwanted baggage, not so good memories. Middle school was harsh. I will gladly let go of those years and say goodbye to JOLT pop, baggy pants, and LL Cool J.
During this time, the photographer, Emma Freeman, showed up to our house. Perfect timing to get those special "getting ready" photos. She, along with her assistant, freely walk around the room and the house without a distraction, finding those perfect moments.
Relatives arrive, dresses are thrown on overly perfectly placed hair, we adorn ourselves with jewels and light. Where is mother? It's 12 noon. We gotta get to Noerenberg Gardens by 12:30 so we can leave there by 1:30! She calls and says she's on her way. We pile into two cars: laura, bryce, and kelly in his car to go get some quick lunch (me, I'll just have a Luna bar, thank you!), and Patrick and I in the Honda.
Off we go to take some photos. I get to see Joseph! There are no bathrooms at this place so we brought quilts that I could change behind. The photography proceeds in the gardens while light summer showers begin to come from the sky. We welcome spontaneity, and this day was going to bring plenty of it. I changed behind the quilts in broad daylight out in the middle of the parking lot. Everybody there was staring, although it's not everyday that you get to see a half-naked bride dressing in the middle of garden (surrounded by multi-million dollar homes, I might add) while the sky sprinkles all over you.
Now, we're ready. Kelly, Laura, and I walk over to where they are taking photos. The first time I get to see Joseph and the first time he sees me. We walk over like we are Charlie's Angels. It didn't matter that we had delicate dresses on. I think strong women are a running theme in our family history. Proud, confident, but not ever delicate. Joseph weeps, we hug and kiss, and so the day continues. Our photographer (Emma Freeman; www.emmafreemanphotography.com) was amazing! She moved in and out of spaces so freely and completely unnoticed. She took some amazingly beautiful shots in the gardens.
Finally, the parents got there with about 15 minutes to spare. We took some family photos and decided to move on to the ceremony site, Gale Woods Farm in Minnetrista. All the guests were beginning to come. We had a chance to speak with some of our friends and family beforehand. A good way to keep it stress free. The support of loved ones is so important. We gathered our extended family and took some more photos. It was the first time in years that all of Joseph's uncles were there on his mom's side of the family. Rita (Joseph's mom) had 6 brothers there and their families. What an amazing time!
It was now time to start. With the help of parents, aunts, uncles, and friends, they all happily took their seats. With a nod of Pastor Karl's head, we began the trek. About 200 yards away lay our destination.
Boyd Lee and Joe Cruz played instrumental music as we made our way up the aisle, two by two: Pastor Karl, Joseph and parents, Kelly and John, Laura and Patrick, Alison (the lovely flower girl), and me with mom and dad.
Joseph was so sweet, with tears of love in his eyes. I tried to stay composed and not start crying (I was more worried about getting splotchy skin than anything!). It was a noble attempt, but I was not successful. The ceremony went beautifully, with readings from Pastor Karl, a song from Boyd Lee and Marcy Kraft (Joseph's aunt), and a reading from Shannon Ostazeski. This reading can be seen below:
Wedding Prayer
Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter to the other.
Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now there is no more loneliness, for each of you will be companion to the other.
Now you are two bodies, But there is only one life before you.
Go now to your dwelling place. To enter into the days of your togetherness.
And may your days be good and long upon the earth.
-Traditional Apache Prayer
Now, a little side note. I want to explain how Joseph and I met. Shannon was my roommate my freshman year and the University of Minnesota - Duluth. We played softball together there and had a great time hanging out. My sophomore year, she moved to a house, soon to be known as the "2020 House." We had weekly get-togethers called Random Mondays where each housemate was to invite a new person each week, either a friend or a classmate, or someone that they just met in the line for coffee. It ended up being a huge hit, so much that we had 40 people there weekly. We talked politics, watched movies, had potlucks, played Mafia, and shared our favorite music. Joseph ended up going a few of the nights that I didn't go. Weird coincidence. That summer I moved home for the summer and Joseph lived in the house. Back then, he had a beard, long hair, and was a vegan (which meant that he was probably 150 pounds or so). That fall he left for Italy to study art.
I moved into the house in the fall and lived in the same room that he did. We never crossed paths at all. Shannon fell in love with a man she worked with at the DNR; they skied together and raised lake trout. The following summer they got married at the berry farm that they purchased on the east side of town. Joseph wasn't going to go to the wedding, but he got a huge stomach ache and realized it was a sign to go. We fell in love at first sight, as we shared our plate of smoked salmon freshly made by our mutual friend, Karl (although we didn't know that the other knew Karl well). So, the reference in the wedding invitation to "that fateful fall day....". That was this day.
Back to the wedding. We danced, ate, and made merry. The band was phenomenal. For food, we wanted everybody to have their choice. A pasta bar was provided where you walk up, choose your pasta, veggies, and sauce and they saute there on the spot for you. Carved meats and salad bar also provided. It was fantastic. High quality restaurant food, definitely not wedding food.
On each table, we had a small cake, one of four flavors: thick carrot cake with cream cheese frosting, lemon raspberry, raspberry ganache, and tempting turtle caramel chocolate cake. Each one was a surprise as we walked around to each table and cut the cake. We encouraged people to go to a different table if they didn't like that kind of cake. And the great thing was that the food nor the cakes cost any more than the most traditional wedding where you pick one meal and have one flavor of cake in sheets.
We danced the night away to concert quality music. The band is actually not a wedding band, but a regular band that plays locally in the Twin Cities. People loved them so much that they bought CD's and still rave about them. My parents have become super fans of the band and now go to their concerts whenever they are in the area.
All in all, the day was everything we expected and more. Everyone is right in saying that you barely remember everything that goes on. That's where a great photographer is key, so that you get to see all those that you love captured in time. We are ever grateful to all those that helped in making this day even more amazing. Having a casual and spontaneous wedding is harder than you think! Although, you'd never be able to tell......
